The Defining Moments
by Kitasky123
Summary: There are defining moments in a person's life, the moments where, by chance or by conscious decision, that person's life is irrevocably changed whether they want it to be or not. What if things had happened differently the night Callie entered the Foster household? How will that change the events of the rest of the story? The relationship between Callie and Stef is a major point.
1. Chapter 1

The Defining Moments

What if things had happened differently the night Callie entered the Foster household? How will that change the events of the rest of the story?

Callie's POV

I stand staring out the lounge room window, my fingers curling tightly in the hem of the t-shirt that Stef had brought me down to wear to sleep in. I can feel myself shaking slightly, though whether from the cold or from the memories battering me I cannot tell.

I can't get the memory of the panic stricken look on Jude's face when I came rushing into the room after hearing the sound of flesh hitting flesh. The terrifying sound of my brother being beaten by our foster father. The thing that I promised I would never let happen to hum. But I couldn't get there in time to stop it. I couldn't do it. I couldn't save him from that one small thing that I had hoped he would never have to go through.

There are defining moments in a person's life, the moments where, by chance or by conscious decision, that person's life is irrevocably changed whether they want it to be or not. Things can spiral out of control and there isn't a thing that can be done to stop the descent.

What I did was one of those moments.

The instant I hit his car, and heard the sirens coming down the street I knew I had made a big mistake. He said I had gone crazy and he was only defending himself. I got taken away.

I left Jude alone in a house with a man that thinks it is ok to backhand a twelve year old boy without a second thought.

I made a horrible mistake.

I turn and walk through to the kitchen, to where I remembered seeing the phone sitting during dinner. I turn the corner with my hand already outstretched to clasp it in my fingers. I falter slightly when I realise it is no longer sitting there.

I can feel myself panicking, unsure of what I can do to get in contact with my brother. I know I need to contact him, I need to know he is ok.

My breath is coming in short, sharp gasps as I grasp the roots of my hair in my fists, trying to calm myself down. The pain of my grip slowly starts to make me focus a little, allowing me to think a little more clearly.

An idea strikes me as I realise that all the kids in this house must have a mobile phone, it just seems like that kind of house. I need to get a hold of one of those phones.

I creep up the stairs to where I know the bedrooms are. All doors except one are closed. I know that I can't open a door without waking the occupants or at least I know I would wake up and I can't take the risk that they might be as light sleepers as I am.

But the room with an open door also has a light on inside.

Things aren't going my way tonight.

I creep towards the open doorway, trying to keep myself in the shadows as much as I possibly can. A floor board squeaks slightly as I step over it and I freeze as I hear movement in the bedroom in response to the noise.

I hold my breath and wait a few moments, expecting at any moment to see an angry face standing in the doorway, annoyed at me for disturbing them.

When that doesn't happen, I take a few more steps until I am leaning against the door frame and suddenly I realize that I am standing in Brandon's room. He is laying on his stomach, facing the opposite direction from me, a book clasped in his hands, his lips moving slightly as he whispers the words to himself. I realise he has headphones on and I can faintly hear the sound of music coming from them. He hadn't moved in response to the floor board, thankfully, he had no idea I was here.

I can see a phone sitting on his bedside table connected to the charger just inside the room. Just as I go to reach for it, I hear a voice behind me.

"Callie?" Stef's voice asks, her voice rough with sleep.

I jolt back like an electric shock has gone through my body.

I freeze for a moment before slowly turning to face Stef. Her blond hair is pulled up into a messy bun and her warm yet calculating blue eyes are studying me intensely. I can see how she makes a good cop.

"What are you doing?" She moves closer to me, slowly as though not to spook me. I'm not sure what the look on my face is to make her feel like that is warranted, yet I am thankful that she hasn't moved too close. I am still unsure of the rules in this house and from my experience, the mothers can be just as bad as the fathers.

I realise that I haven't answered in a few moments as she moves closer and lifts a hand as if to place it on my arm.

I flinch back involuntarily.

Stef lets her hand drop, an almost pained expression flashing across her features before morphing into a clearly practiced calm expression.

"Callie?" She asks, her voice also carefully controlled. "What are you doing?"

"I… I think I was sleepwalking." I stutter slightly, hoping the shadows I am standing in hide the proof that I am lying from my face.

"Sleepwalking?" Stef repeats, her voice showing that she does not believe me.

"Yeah." I answer my voice steady, I can feel my face schooling into the calm look that I have also perfected after many beatings from my first foster father, needing to be calm made it easier, tears just gave him what he wanted.

"Ok well you need to get back down to bed, it's going to be a long day tomorrow. I'll follow you down, I need a drink of water any way." The tone of her voice left now room for arguing. I nod my head slightly before stepping away from Brandon's doorway. Stef waits for me to move in front of her before following a few feet behind down the stairs.

I stop and go to move into the lounge room where the couch has been set up with blankets and pillows for me to have a place to sleep.

"Come into the kitchen and have a drink as well." Stef says, and I know that it is not an option to say no.

I sigh slightly before following her into the kitchen. I stand awkwardly next to the island and watch as she moves around the kitchen grabbing glasses from the cupboards.

It's quiet for a few moments as Stef turns on the tap to pour two glasses of water. She places on the island in front of one of the stools and gestures for me to sit on it.

I gingerly sit, barely balancing on the very edge of the seat, braced to bolt if I need to. Though a fight with a foster parent has never started with them getting me a drink of water first, there is always a first for everything.

Stef eyes me as she calmly sits on the seat at the far end of the kitchen island, as far away from me as she can be without leaving the kitchen. Her pained eyes make me think that she knows exactly what is racing through my head right now.

The silence feels heavy and full of things that want to be said, but neither of us are voicing them for the moment. Her warm blue eyes meet my wide, brown eyes and I look away, my cheeks warming with what I know is a blush. She clears her throat, breaking the silence, her long fingers move to tighten the hair band that is wrapped around her messy blond hair.

"So," Stef starts, her voice gentle. "Want to tell me the real reason that I found you upstairs just now?"

I stare down at my lap, my fingers, with their chipped fingernails, are wringing together, squeezing then letting go just to start again.

"Callie," Stef murmurs, leaning her hands against the counter top. "I don't appreciate being lied to."

"How…" I start, my voice breaking before I can get any more out and fading into silence.

"How did I know you were lying?" She asks, a small smile gracing her pink lips. "I've raised three teenagers, and I spend all day every day at work around people who don't want to tell me the truth. There are tells that show when a person is lying. I know how to spot those."

I look at her before looking at my hands in my lap again, picking at the nails on my left hand. We sit in silence for another few moments before Stef sighs. She gets up and moves towards my end of the kitchen island. I can feel myself shaking more the closer she gets to me.

"Callie, I'm not going to hurt you. I have never once raised a hand to the children in this house, while you are here, you will never be hurt. I promise." She goes to rub my shoulder but I move away slowly and she drops it back to her side.

"I want to help you. I really do but I can't do anything if you don't open up to me." She murmurs, her voice sound like she is trying to calm a screaming child. I wonder if that is what she thinks I am.

"Do you know the reason I went to Juvie?" I whisper, my eyes till following the movements of my fingers.

"You attacked your fosters fathers car with a baseball bat?" Stef answers me with the given reason.

I nod. "Yeah I did that. I did. But do you know why?"

Stef shakes her head and leans her elbows against her bench, leaning towards me without actually coming closer.

"That's the reason my foster father gave to the police when they showed up. Nobody cared to ask me my side of his story. So I got thrown in Juvie." I say, my voice harsh.

"So what is your side?" her blue eyes are curious as they study me. She looks like the kind of person who I can spill everything to and she will just take care of it. The thought scares me because I have never relied on anyone to take care of anything for me for the last six years.

Six years is a long time to not be able to trust anyone.

"Callie?"

I realise I have been quiet for a long time. My voice stuck in my throat. Stef reaches across the counter top towards me, moving slowly as not to startle me. Her hands still my fidgeting fingers, her touch warm, soft and gentle and I resist the urge to pull away. For some reason I don't want to see the pained look that I know will pass through her eyes before she can mask it. The thought of hurting her makes me feel uncomfortable, despite the fact that I have only known her for a few hours and her reaction to me being her wasn't overly welcoming. But despite this, I have never had a foster parent who has tried to talk to me like this before nor has their touch been so comforting.

Just as I go to answer her, we are interrupted by Lena walking into the kitchen, her hand rubbing her eyes tiredly. In her left hand is the phone that I had been looking for earlier. She places it back into the cradle before looking up.

"Stef," She starts before stopping, realising pretty quickly that she walked into something heavy and an apologetic look crosses her features. "I'm sorry to interrupt, I just came down to hand up the phone, it was going flat and beeping. I'll just head back upstairs."

She backs out of the room but the damage has already been done. I pull my hands out of Stef's grasp and move away from the kitchen island.

"Callie," She starts but I shake my head.

"I'm really tired can I just go to bed please?" I hate the pleading tone that I can hear in my voice.

Stef studies me for a few moments, her eyes frustrated, before sighing and nodding her head.

"Go ahead," She murmurs. "I'll see you tomorrow."

She stands still next to the table, her arms crossed, until I move into the lounge room before heading to the stairs. I can feel her watching me as I lay on the couch and pull the blankets up to my neck and turn to face the back of the couch. Her gaze is heavy and there is a pull to turn around, to finish the conversation but I refuse to look at her.

I can't open up to her all the way. It's only a temporary placement. If I get attached to her, to the whole family, then I don't know how I will cope when we get sent away and it is just me and Jude against the world again. I can't let my guard down, I can't begin to trust people when I know that most people do not deserve to be trusted, that I need to stay vigilant so that I can protect my brother. I can't become soft now.

I wait about an hour before creeping into the kitchen, grabbing the phone that Lena had thankfully brought back down. I dial the number I know by heart and hold my breath as I hear it ring.

After six long rings I hear the sound of it being answered.

"Hello?" the tired voice I longed to hear murmurs into the phone.

"Baby! Baby it's me." I say into the phone.

"Callie?" Jude's excited gasp rings through the phone and makes me breathe a sigh of relief.

"Yeah baby, it's me." I whisper. "Are you ok? Please tell me you're ok?"

"I'm ok, I promise." He answers quickly, knowing that I need to be reassured. "He hasn't been too bad. I've been avoiding him."

"I'm going to come for you as soon as I can, alright?" I murmur into the phone.

"I know." Jude says, his surety in me has always astounded me, so secure in the fact that no matter what, I will do everything in my power to always protect him. Even despite my last mistake. He still sounds so certain. "I missed you."

"I know, I missed you too baby," I breathe into the phone, my voice tight with tears. "I'm so sorry, I promise I'll make up for it."

"How?" he asks.

"I'm not sure yet." I answer. "But I promise, when I get to you, I'll do something special for you. Now I've gotta go, so you be good alright, be careful. I'll see you as soon as I can. I promise. Goodnight baby."

"Goodnight Callie." He says. "See you soon."

I hear the dial tone ringing in my ears and it takes me a few moments to be able to hang up the phone and put it down. I slump back into the cushions of the couch, feeling lighter than I have in weeks since hearing his voice.

The weight doesn't take long to settle back over me as I realise that I somehow have to make it all the way to San Ysidro from Anchor Beach and I had no idea how I was going to do that. I feel the tears prickle in my eyes uncomfortably and I angrily swipe them away. I don't cry and I can't let myself start now.

I drift into an uneasy slumber, half-finished plans darting through my head.

**A/N I hope you guys like my story so far, if you do please read and review, it only takes a few moments. If I get enough interest I will post the next chapter which is already finished and over 3500 words in Stef's POV.**


	2. Chapter 2

The Defining Moments

I am so surprised at the massive response this has gotten so soon. I really appreciate you all taking the time to review this for me, and thanks to all the guests who I can't reply to in person. As promised here is the next chapter in Stef's POV, ending at just under 400 words. Enjoy and keep reviewing :)

Stef's POV

I watch Callie as she crawls onto the couch, pull the blankets up and turn away from me. I sigh quietly and walk up the stairs, the wooden banister cold under my hand. I was so close to getting Callie to talk before Lena walked in. I could see the walls dropping from her eyes and the instant Lena walked in they snapped straight back up. You could instantly see the change, from scared and confused to blank and slightly hostile within the space of a millisecond. She just pulled away from me.

I'm not sure why she opened up to me in the first place. I'm ashamed to say that I gave her a less than warm welcome. I know that really all she was doing was trying to push our buttons, just to get a reaction, see how far our limits could go. All teenagers do that, push the boundaries to see just how much they can get away with, stretch the reins until they know when they have to pull back before it goes too far. But, it had been a long day and I just didn't have the patience that I would normally have.

I reach our room and Lena pulls the blankets back for me to climb in. I stand in the doorway for a minute before sitting on the edge of the bed and put my head in my hands, leaning my elbows against my knees.

"Stef?" Lena moves towards me, her hand resting gently on my shoulder and squeezing gently.

I shake my head and lean into her slightly. Her body warm against mine as she rubs her hands up and down my arms.

"I'm sorry I interrupted things," Lena murmurs. "I didn't mean to…"

"I know love." I sigh. "I just… we were so close to getting somewhere and then the walls just snapped straight back up."

"What were you two talking about?" Lena asks, her voice soft.

"About the reason she was sent to Juvie." I answer, rubbing my temples. "I think there was more to it than what is written in her file."

"Yeah I kind of got that idea too." Lena says, her hands massaging my shoulders and back.

"What do you mean?" I ask, turning to face her.

"When I went to pick her up, she was really upset and asking about someone called Jude. When she was going to go to bed, I asked her who he was and just as she went to tell me well… you walked in with clothes for her to sleep in." She says, her brown eyes meeting mine.

"Well it seems like we are both brilliant at interrupting the beginnings of important conversations." I grumble and lay back and lean into my pillows. I gently pull Lena with me to rest her head on my chest, my arm wrapping around her and playing with a curl of her hair that is loose from her bun, my other hand rubbing her arm as she places her hand on my stomach and snuggles into me.

"But I think you were in further than I ever got. We can deal with this tomorrow ok?" She whispers into the dark. "It's going to be a long day as it is, it won't help if neither of us has any sleep."

"Ok, goodnight my love." I kiss her forehead and pull the blankets up with my other hand.

Not long after I hear Lena's breathing slow and even out. She has always been quick to fall asleep. Sadly I have never been able to have that luxury. She says it only happens when I am with her but I guess I will never find out whether or not she is telling the truth.

I lay for ages until I finally fall into a fitful sleep.

The next morning I wake up to the smell of coffee drifting up the stairs from the kitchen.

I roll onto my side and look at the clock sitting on my bedside table, seeing that it is only just past four thirty in the morning. I know that it can't possibly be any of the children upstairs because they don't wake before they have to for anything so I know that it must be Callie.

I extricate myself from Lena, who is still fast asleep with her arm still wrapped over my stomach and her leg now thrown across mine. She has always been a cuddly sleeper. I pad down the stairs quietly in my sock clad feet, wrapping my dressing gown around me and tying the cord into a bow as I go.

I peek into the lounge room first to see that the couch is indeed empty before following the smell of coffee into the kitchen.

Here I find Callie, with her hip leaning against the bench top, facing away from me. Her hair is mused as if she had been tossing and turning for all of the few hours in which she had been in bed.

"Callie?" I murmur but she doesn't acknowledge me in the slightest. Maybe she didn't hear me.

I make sure to make noise as I move towards her, so as not to startle her by suddenly coming up behind her suddenly, but despite this she still jumps a mile when I place my hand softly on her shoulder.

She darts away from my touch and turns around quickly, her face and eyes shining with panic before her walls crash into place, leaving only a slightly wary look behind. She sighs and puts her hand to her chest, her breath coming in short sharp gasps as she tries to calm down.

"Sorry." I whisper, my hands raised at my sides, palms towards her in a non-threatening pose. "I thought you would have heard me coming."

"No," She gasps. "Not your fault. I just was in my own little world. I don't normally let myself become so unaware, I normally always know who and what is around me, that's the thing that startled me the most I think. The fact that I didn't know you were coming when I should have. But I guess that I wasn't thinking far beyond that fact that I need caffeine.

She gestures to the pot that is brewing, the mug sitting next to it.

"Why should you have known I was coming?" I ask her, her phrasing alluding to something deeper than just being in her own world.

"I've trained myself to be always aware. I'm a light sleeper, meaning I wake up at the slightest noise within a room of me, and when I'm awake, even when I'm doing something else, I always know exactly what is going on around me, who is there and what they are doing. What their moods are from just a glance." She answers, turning away from me to pour a full mug of coffee. "Well normally anyway."

"Why would you need to do that?" I ask, stepping into what I know could be dangerous territory. I take the mug from her as she offers it to me and she turns around to pour another for herself. Normally I don't condone drinking coffee for any of the teenagers in this house but I can see it's an issue I shouldn't push at the moment.

"I've found out that it is a necessity. Not knowing someone's mood means that I can tread on a landmine without even noticing and well I've learnt that it doesn't work well for me." The matter of fact tone in her voice frightens me. "I'm guessing you have seen my file. And I'm guessing although it may not always be completely truthful with only one side of every story, because really who is honest in this system, but I haven't exactly had the nicest foster families."

I'm surprised once again with how much she has shared with me and I know by the look in her eyes that she is shocked too and I can see her beginning to close off even more. She looks down at the mug in her hand, her fingers tracing the rim and avoids looking at me.

"Callie..." I start but she turns towards me with an angry spark in her eyes.

"Don't!" She whispers harshly.

"Callie, what?" I say taking a step back as she flinches away from my hand that I had reached out to her.

"Don't give me that look of pity!" She snaps and steps further away from me. "I don't need your pity."

"Callie, I don't pity you." I start, trying to move towards her but instantly stop as she moves again further away from me. "Callie, please."

"Just don't ok!" She puts her full mug down on the bench and stalks out of the kitchen and into the lounge room.

I move to the sink and rinse out both of our mugs before leaning against the bench, my arms wrapped around my waist. I give her a few moments to settle down a little before following in her footsteps.

As I move into the lounge room I see a distressed Callie pacing back and forth along the length of the room, looking like a caged animal. I know I have to pick my next move carefully because I know that one wrong move and she will more than likely bolt on me.

I step carefully down into the lounge room, my hands once again raised as I move towards her, stopping just after the few steps. Her hands are fiddling with the hem of the grey t-shirt I gave her to sleep in, gripping the material tightly in fists, so tightly that her knuckles were white. Her grip would grow even tighter at each turn, the tendons in her wrists and hands bulging out.

"Callie, I need you to calm down and talk to me." I say in my calm, soothing voice. "I can't help you if you don't tell me what's wrong."

She throws me a glance as she paces past me but otherwise doesn't acknowledge my presence.

"Callie, please."

"I don't need your help!" she growls, her posture stiffening as she continues her pacing.

"Callie, can I move closer and sit on the couch please?" I ask, not wanting to move closer than she wants me to be. There is an ache inside of me, that comes when any of my children are upset, that makes me want to pull her to me and wrap her in my arms, the way that makes all the others feel safe and protected. I have only known this girl for a few hours, yet seeing her so distressed hurts. But I know I can't do that, she doesn't even like me just touching her arm for the briefest of moments.

"It's your house." She says, not even bothering to look in my direction. "Why are you asking me to sit on your own furniture?"

"I don't want to make you uncomfortable but moving any closer than what you want me to be while you are so upset." I say, still standing where I had first stopped, waiting for her to acknowledge me properly.

What I said got an instant reaction from her. Her pacing stopped suddenly and she turned to face me, a shocked look colouring her features.

"Why do you care if I'm uncomfortable?" Her voice is confused as her serious brown eyes study me.

"I would never intentionally do anything that would make you upset or uncomfortable in any way. I have noticed that physical contact, and close proximity makes you edgy. I don't want to make you any more on edge than you obviously already are." I answer, finally letting my hands fall to my side now that I know she is fully aware of where I am and can see that I am not going to do anything to harm her in any way.

"No one has ever cared whether or not I was uncomfortable before. If they even noticed that is." Her voice is gentler as she finally lets go of the hem of the t-shirt, her fingers growing red slowly as the blood rushes back to them.

I can feel my body relax slightly, the tension that I hadn't realized I was still holding, at seeing her so stressed, easing from my body.

"I know that you haven't had the easiest of times, but I promise that in this house, if you feel uncomfortable in any way at all, even if it is only slightly, all you have to do is say and I will do my best to fix what is wrong. Now can we both sit down and talk for a while please?"

She eyes me cautiously before nodding her head sharply.

I move slowly and sit down on the couch, resting against the back cushions and watch her as she stands still, her posture still slightly stiff. I wait for her to make her move, by me sitting first she could decide how close she wants to be to me on her own.

She eyes the seat next to me for a few moments before shaking her head and moving to the arm chair that is opposite me yet across the room. I had a feeling she wouldn't sit close to me. She grips a throw pillow to her chest, and pulls her knees up in front of her. A classic defensive pose. Despite calming slightly, I know she is still not altogether what I would call comfortable. She would not make this any easier for me or for herself.

"So do you want to tell me what has got you up so early?" I ask, picking my fingernails so as not to pressure her by staring at her.

"I couldn't sleep." She says, her voice, while not harsh, was not exactly warm either.

"Any particular reason why?" I look at her briefly and see that she has large, bruised looking patches under her eyes, indicating that she clearly had not had a good sleep in a while.

Why had I not noticed them before?

Her eyes are also bloodshot and despite her best efforts to hide it her face showed just how exhausted she must be. I suppose she had never really looked at us fully since she got here, and it is easy to get distracted by the large purple bruise on her cheek and her split lip as a result from the beating she had taken yesterday morning in juvie.

"A few." She mumbles, snapping me from my study of her face.

I look away from her slowly and look around the room. It is dimly lit with the light being thrown out from the small desk lamp sitting beside her. The room is slowly taking on the soft grey light of the coming dawn from the open curtains.

"Would you like to talk about any of them?" Even as I say it I know what her answer will be.

There is a long pause in where Callie clutches the pillow more tightly to her chest. The pause is so long that I resign myself to the fact that she isn't going to answer me. Just as I am about to speak she looks towards me quickly and open her mouth as if to speak. She gasps slightly before closing it again. I wait a few more moments for her to sort out what she wants to say.

"I made a horrible mistake." She whispers so softly that I barely catch it, her forehead resting on her knees briefly before she turns her dark eyes back to me.

Her response startles me and it takes me a moment to respond. I was really not expecting any other answer besides no.

"What do you mean sweets?" The endearment slipping from my mouth without any conscious decision to do so.

"Destroying my previous foster father's car." She mumbles, her eyes showing regret. "But it was the only thing I could think of at the time to make him stop. It was his most precious possession. I knew by attacking that, he would stop, that he would come after me and he would just stop. But the instant I heard the sirens, I knew… I knew it was so wrong."

"Honey," I whisper, leaning forward slightly, dreading the answer that I think will come with this question but having to ask. "What did you want to stop him from doing?"

"I … I left him behind. Unprotected." She carries on, apparently having not heard my question. "He has never been in a home without me before! I am always there with him, stepping on the land mines first so that he wouldn't get hurt. Protecting him when he accidently did something wrong. I left him behind unprotected."

"Callie!" I say a little louder, not wanting to startle her but needing her to answer me. "You need to slow down baby. What did you want to stop your foster father from doing and who are you talking about?"

"He found him wearing one of his ex-wife's dresses. He just started hitting him before I could get to him. I tried to stop him but he kicked me. I couldn't get him to stop and he was hurting him and he was crying. The next thing I knew I had a baseball bat in my hand and the windscreen of his Trans Am was shattering." Her body is shaking as she says, her fingers clenching the skin of her upper arm as she begins to rock back and forth in the arm chair.

"Callie," I whisper, wanting to reach out for her, to sooth her and make her loosen the grip on her arms which I am sure must be hurting her. I lift my arm but stop myself, my hand pausing in mid-air over the coffee table between us. I know I can't just touch her, not in the state she is in, I know for sure that would cause her to bolt. I slowly slide off the couch and onto the floor and carefully move across the carpet towards her on my knees, not standing so as not to tower over her, and stop at the edge of the coffee table. "Who was he hurting?"

"Jude." She whispers, her voice cracking slightly. She raises her head to look and me. She starts a little as she realises that I have moved closer but she doesn't move away from me so I guess that is a good sign.

"Who is Jude?" I shift slightly, so I am sitting on the heels of my feet, my hands resting on the floor in front of me, leaning forward so that I can see her eyes better. I realise that they are glistening with unshed tears.

"My baby brother." She murmurs. "He is only twelve and so small. My foster father used to hit me all the time, and that was fine, I could take that. But Baby… he is just…"

She gasps and resumes her rocking back and forth, her fingers gripping her arms even tighter. A lump forms in my throat at the thought of Callie being hit by a man that is supposed to protect her all the time and hurting a little boy. I didn't know she had a brother and I am assuming Lena didn't either otherwise she would have mentioned it. How could this information not have been passed onto us?

"I just wanted him to stop!" She sobs loudly. Her forehead bangs against her knees and her shoulders begin to shake as she starts to cry. Her breath coming in pants and her terrified sobs send chills down my spine.

Despite all the knowledge that I know I shouldn't, I move beside her quickly and pull her into my arms, wrapping the tightly around her and moving her head to rest against my chest. She instantly begins to fight against me, trying desperately to move away, her hands finally letting go of her upper arms to push against my chest, her sobs turning to a high pitched keening that is scary to listen to, the sound so desperate and terrified, but I refuse to let her go and after about five minutes she slumps against me. Her face is resting in the crook of my neck, her tears wetting my skin. I move us quickly so that she is curled up in my lap as I sit in the chair, her body slightly too big but her weight light enough that it isn't too much of a problem. I clasp her to my chest in a tight grip with my right arm, the hand of my left smoothing her hair out of her face and rubbing up and down her back softly in a way that has always soothed my children. I gently rock us both back and forth, whispering soothing words into her ear, not really noticing what I am saying. I gently graze my fingers over the angry red splotches that are the shape of Callie's fingertips that are left behind from her tight grip. The lump in my throat grows at the thought that she had hurt herself, knowing that they would most likely grow into painful bruises.

Her takes a while but I eventually I can feel her body completely relax and her breath even out in the way that it only does when sleep overcomes someone. I continue to rock us however, my hand still smoothing over the top of her head and down her back and up again, not wanting to still the movements that had finally brought some comfort to the dark haired girl that I am sure had not accepted any from anyone in a long time.

I look up and am startled to see Lena leaning in the entrance to the lounge room, tears slowly moving down her dark skinned face, her brown eyes glistening with more tears that are yet to be shed. I don't know how long she has been standing there but I am guessing it has been awhile from the looks of her pained face.

She moves slowly towards me, and kneels down next to the chair in which we are both situated. She goes to brush her hand across Callie's still damp cheek but I quickly shake my head.

"Please," I whisper. "I don't want to startle her."

She nods and withdraws her hand before placing it gently on my cheek, she smooths her thumb under my eye and I am surprise when it comes away wet. I had not realised that I had started to cry also, the pain of the girl in my lap, hurting me so deeply as well.

"I didn't even know she had a brother." She whispers to me, resting her chin against her arm which is leaning against the arm of the chair. "Bill didn't tell me and it wasn't mentioned in her file from what I have read."

"I don't know love." I move to quickly squeeze her hand before resuming the rubbing of Callie's back.

"What are we going to do?" Lena murmurs, her voice sounding pained.

"Well for a start," I answer. "We are going to get Jude out of that house."


	3. Chapter 3

The Defining Moments

I'm glad that you are all enjoying this so far, I have received seven reviews and three followers already at the point of starting this chapter. So without further ado, I give you the next chapter:

Stef's POV

I spend the rest of the morning with Callie continuously sleeping curled on my lap, not stopping the movement of my hand up her back and down her back, squeezing her tighter to my chest as she lets out the occasional pained whimper.

As I predicted the skin of her upper arm is mottled with purple, finger shaped bruises from the tight grip she maintained on them in the height of her distress. She must have held on so incredibly tight for the bruises to form this quickly. Within a few more hours they are sure to be black.

Despite being so tired I can't let myself fall asleep, I can't let my grip on this girl slacken as whenever I try to shift to lay her on the couch, her whimpers grow and her fist grips the front of my t-shirt tightly, holding herself to me. The sound slicing so painfully through me every single time, that I have stopped even the thought of moving.

Lena is asleep curled up in the other arm chair, a small throw blanket pulled up over her shoulders, her dark, springy curls falling across her face slightly. Her face is calm and at peace in her sleep. She stayed kneeling next to me for about a half hour before she dozed off again. I tried to make her go back upstairs to bed but she refused, taking refuge instead in the chair next to me. That was at about 6.00 and it is nearing 7.30 now.

I know we don't have much longer before the rest of the kids get up and I am unsure as to how I am going to handle the coming situation.

I sit for a few more minutes and wait until Lena starts to stir, the blanket slipping down to pool in her lap as her internal body clock kicks in, telling her that it is time to wake up. She blinks sleepily and looks around the room slowly, an adorable confused expression colouring her face, and I know that she is disorientated about her whereabouts, but when her eyes land on me, realisation dawns in her eyes and she sits up straighter, looking at Callie who is still fast asleep in my lap.

"Has she been asleep this whole time?" She asks in a hushed voice. Her fine, delicate features are a mask of concern.

I nod and gently kiss the top of Callie's head, brushing away the few stray hairs that have made their way across her forehead with gentle fingers.

"The occasionally whimper," I add to my nod. "But she is obviously so exhausted she hasn't moved. Besides starting an incredibly tight grip on my t-shirt every time I try to move that is."

"She may act like an adult most of the time," Lena murmurs, piling her hair on top of her head in a big bun. "But she really is just a scared little girl."

I nod, agreeing wholeheartedly with what she is saying. I turn back to resting my cheek on the top of Callie's head, her warm breath fanning across my neck, and rock us slightly. I can feel Lena's eyes on me but I don't turn back to her.

"I think it's time for me to get up." She says quietly.

Lena gracefully unfolds her long limbs from the chair and stands up, stretching her arms above her, her t-shirt riding up a little to reveal a thin strip of smooth, brown skin, and cracks her back with a sigh. A thing that I have told her repeatedly not to do because I hate the sound it makes, but I let it slide this morning.

"I should not sleep in chairs." She whispers as she moves towards me, pulling my head back to gently peck me on the lips over the back of the seat so she didn't have to lean across Callie.

"I told you to go up to bed." I scold her mildly.

"Yeah well, I don't take orders from you my love." She winks playfully, a small grin working its way across her pink lips, a welcome gesture to my tired self, a small hint of normalcy, in a situation that is so far from normal. "I'll go sort out the children upstairs, I'll keep them away from the lounge room. We'll go out the back door today for a change. I'll excuse Callie from her classes for today, saying she needs more time to settle into the house first or something."

"Thank you." I whisper, blowing her a kiss as she moves up the stairs and into the foyer, throwing me one last look over her shoulder before she climbs the main flight of stairs up to the bedrooms. I can hear her footsteps move towards our room, which is almost directly above this room, and the opening and closing of our cupboards and drawers. I know that she is changing quickly and washing her face and brushing her teeth before anyone else is up. After about five minutes I hear her move out of our room and into one of the bedrooms.

It's going to be a rush to get them all ready this morning, normally we both already have a decent breakfast made by this point, ready for when the children come down, but with me out of commission I guess it will be a cereal or a piece of fruit type of morning.

I lean my cheek against the top of Callie's head slowly, her face still pressed into the crook of my neck, and feel my eyes close tiredly. I can hear the sound of the shower turning on in the upstairs bathroom, the pipes creaking softly, and the sound of voices floating down the stairs as Lena rouses the others.

I feel a stirring against me and start slightly at the sudden movement. I lift my head and glance down at Callie quickly only to see her eyes open, a hand, the one that isn't fisted in my t-shirt still, rubbing harshly against the sleep that is in the corner of her eyes.

I stay quiet and wait for her to wake up fully, my arm that is around her relaxing slightly as she shifts. I don't think she realises what is going on yet because her dazed eyes trace the room before looking up to look at me.

All of a sudden she pushes against me, the movement so quick that I don't have time to tighten my arm before she is falling off of my lap and thumping onto the floor, a pained gasp escaping her as her elbow bangs loudly against the coffee table in front of us.

She snatches the limb back quickly and clutches it to her chest as she pushes herself across the floor quickly to stop with her back against the corner of the room across from me, her pained look in her eyes. Her breath coming in quick pants as her eyes dart around the room before locking onto me, still frozen in the chair, having not had the chance to move with the events that happened so quickly.

The sound of running footsteps makes me look away from her as a more panicked expression blooms on her fact, pushing herself further into the corner. Lena comes tripping down the stairs with a worried look on her face before sliding to a stop on the polished wood floor in her sock clad feet. Her wide, brown eyes jump from me still sitting in the chair to Callie who is trying to make herself as small as possible and back to me again. Her mouth has fallen open in shock.

I move to stand in front of Callie as I realise that Brandon and Jesus are standing half way down the stairs looking down at the tableau in front of them, their faces confused. Mariana must be the one in the shower.

"We're ok." I say to them, as they all turn to face me. "Callie just had a little startled awakening is all. Everything is fine. Go up and keep getting ready for school please."

I wait until they nod and slowly turn and make their way upstairs before turning to Lena, who is standing in the entrance way, her face worried, her weight shifting from foot to foot.

"Can you get us an ice pack please?" I ask her quietly. "Callie hit her elbow pretty hard on the way down."

She takes another quick look at me and Callie before nodding and turning to hurry to the kitchen. I hear the freezer open and things shifting for a moment before I hear Lena's light footsteps returning back to the lounge room.

She steps slowly towards me and hands me the ice pack that she has wrapped in a tea towel for a bit of insulation.

"Thanks Love." I whisper, kissing her on the cheek gently.

"What happened?" she asks, her eyes moving to look over my shoulder at Callie who is slowly starting to calm down.

"She just got a little startled when she woke up to find me so close. She moved before I could stop her and feel off the chair and hitting her elbow, which would be the loud bangs you heard. But we will be all good hear, I can handle it."

I look behind me quickly before turning back to Lena and saying, "Can you handle the questions the boys have will most likely have?"

"Yeah I can handle that." She answers, hugging me swiftly before moving to head up the stairs again. "I told them they could use our bathroom as well to shower and whatnot so we will be out of here twice as quickly as normally since I already showered last night. I'll call you at lunch to check in on things alright?"

I nod and wait patiently as she walks back up the stairs. I stand still in front of Callie, the icepack cooling my fingertips as I hold it but I don't attempt to walk towards Callie with it while everyone else is in the house. She knew Callie would be uncomfortable if she reacted the way she did last night with everyone awake and aware of what is going on.

It takes another ten minutes before the sound of footsteps move down the steps followed by the voices of the family as they move out the back door and around the side of the house to the car.

I wait another few moments before turning to face Callie. Her face is hidden in the nest of her arms that are leaning on her knees. Her body is shaking slightly and I can just hear the sound of her shallow breathing.

I slowly crouch down in front of her, my hands leaning on my knees and I sit slightly on my heels. I can feel the cold of the icepack seeping through my jeans.

"Callie?" I whisper.

She shifts slightly, indicating that she heard me and I take the opportunity to move more closely to the cowering girl.

"I have an icepack for your elbow, sweets." I whisper, placing it down in between us. "I know your elbow must be hurting, you hit it really hard. It's sitting just in front of you when you want to grab it."

Her shaking intensifies and it's another few moments before her hand comes creeping out to grab the icepack from the floor. As soon as her fingers grasp the ice she snatches it back quickly and puts it up against her left elbow. A pained gasp escapes her lips at the pressure before a relieved sigh follows as the coolness registers against the sore limb.

"Is that better?" I ask, moving to sit down properly, crossing my legs.

She nods, before leaning her head back, banging it slightly, against the wall behind her.

In the quiet I realise how stiff my body is after spending hours in the same position on the arm chair, portraying the fact that I am not as young as I would like to think I am.

Callie shifts slightly in her corner, adjusting the icepack so it sits on the other side of her elbow. The skin revealed is a bright red, whether from the cold of the pack or from hitting it, I can' tell.

"Are you ok?" I murmur, leaning back on my hands, stretching my back a little.

Callie nods her head sharply, not looking in my direction, a light pink blush colouring her cheeks.

"In words please honey." I say, studying her body language.

"I'm ok." She answers, her voice raspy, most likely from all the crying this morning. "Sore, but ok."

"Yeah, you did hit pretty hard on the way down." I reply. "Does anything other than your elbow hurt?"

I can see her about to shake her head but with a sharp look from me she sighs before saying, "my tailbone hurts a little. I think I just landed on it a bit hard."

"Do you want another icepack?" I ask her, sitting up a little straighter.

"No, it doesn't hurt that bad." She answers, turning away from me to look out the window across the room from us.

I let her watch the birds outside for a few moments. Not wanting to stress her out when she is beginning to calm down but knowing I need to talk to her about this morning.

"Why did you jump away from me so quickly after you woke up?" I ask, my voice calm and casual, trying to make the conversation flow as easy as possible.

"I… I uh…" She stutters before breaking off and leaning her head against her knees again.

"Callie, please." I say, leaning towards her. "Talk to me."

"I'm just not used to being so close to people." She sighs, her voice sounding bitter. "I guess it just startled me a little."

She lifts her head back up and leans back into the corner again, her body sagging with exhaustion. Her brown eyes slip closed and her breathing slows a bit. A I bite my inner cheek, knowing that I am about to destroy her beginning calm.

"Callie," I begin, my voice tensing slightly making her body stiffen a little. "I don't want to make you upset but we need to talk about what happened earlier this morning."

Her body stiffens even more just like I expected and her eyes flash open, an indecipherable look within them.

"I don't want to talk about that right now." She says, her voice snapping slightly.

"Callie," I say with a stern voice, the one I reserve for very serious conversations. "We need to discuss what is going to happen and how we are going to handle the situation."

"This conversation is making me uncomfortable." She says, her eyes blazing, knowing she has caught me out with my own words from last night. "You said that in this house, if I was uncomfortable, you would fix it and make it stop."

I sigh and pinch the bridge of my nose tightly, my eyes squeezed shut and take in a few calming breaths. I should have known that just because she opened up to me last night, that it doesn't mean that we will suddenly be able to just talk about absolutely everything. She is still a scared girl who is unsure of who, if anyone, she can trust.

"Ok. Alright," I say, dropping my hand to my lap, looking into her brown eyes that are way too serious and hard for a girl who is only just sixteen. "Here is what is going to happen, we are both going to go upstairs, we are going to have a shower and get dressed then come back down here for breakfast. Once we have eaten we are going to discuss what happened this morning and what we are going to do from here on out. Understand?"

She glares at me, her face angry at being told what to do, she goes to open her mouth but I cut her off with a raised hand.

"I said, do you understand?"

Her mouth snaps shut and she nods sharply at me. Using her right arm she begins to push herself up from the ground and despite trying to hide it I notice the look of pain that crosses her features before she sits quickly back down on the ground.

"Are you ok?" I rush to move towards her, my arm moving around her shoulders, and ignore the slight flinch that she makes.

"I guess my back hurts more than I realised." She sighs, realising that there is no point hiding the fact.

"You should have said something." I sigh. "Here, I will help you upstairs."

I wind my arm around her waist, getting her to lean her wait against me before lifting both of us up from the ground. It is almost too easy to lift her, and I have a brief flash of concern about how light her weight is but I shove that thought down. With everything on the plate right now that one will just have to wait for a bit.

With Callie leaning heavily against me, her arm also wrapped around me, we awkwardly move up the stairs and into the bathroom. I sit her gently on the closed toilet lid and move to get towels out of the linen cupboard just outside.

"Here," I say, sitting them on the edge of the sink. "Your clothes are folded up in the basket over there. Spare toothbrushes are on that shelf and shampoo and conditioner is in the shower. If you need anything, I'll be just across the hall in my bathroom so just sing out."

She nods, her eyes moving around the room, finding everything that I had just pointed out to her.

"Will you be right to run the shower and get in with your back?" I ask, knowing that even if she did really need help, she would never ask for my help with this.

A bright red blush creeps across her cheeks and she nods her head quickly, her eyes looking anywhere but at me.

"Ah… I ah yeah." She stammers embarrassedly. "I can do that, I'm not getting up from the ground now so I'll be fine."

I nod briefly before moving out of the bathroom and closing the door lightly behind me. I sigh quietly, my hand running across my face tiredly before moving into mine and Lena's room and into our en-suite. I run the shower, making the water steaming hot to get rid of my aches before stripping down and stepping under the flow.

I feel the warm water instantly begin to soothe me and my muscles starting to relax. I know that I need to enjoy it while I can because I know that despite getting her to open up earlier, this is going to be a stressful time the rest of this day is going to be anything but easy.

**A/N The moral of this chapter is, that just because Callie opened up to Stef, and blurted everything out, and cried, and allowed herself to be comforted, she still isn't going to make things easy for herself or Stef. She still doesn't really trust Stef and her opening up to begin with was more an act of extreme exhaustion and stress combining to make a very volatile Callie resulting in her breaking down. Her feelings about all this will be in the next chapter.**

**At the moment the characters seem to be having a mind of their own as this isn't exactly heading in the direction I want at the present moment but every time I try to write what I want it seems to just end up going in a different direction. Like from the minute Lena brought the phone back down in the first chapter, my original plan derailed, but no matter how I tried Lena wanted to bring the phone down so I had to just run with it. I think it is still working though, hopefully and I think I have a way to turn it around so bear with me guys, it'll get there eventually. **

**Please read and review guys, it is seriously a great motivator for me to start a new chapter really quickly, and also write this much, none of my other stories have chapters near this long.**

**And thanks and apologies to anyone who read the entirety of this A/N. I tend to ramble without meaning to and hope that you guys won't hold it against me : ) **

**Story statistics at the end of this chapter: **

**11 reviews**

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**Thanks again guys : )**


	4. Chapter 4

The Defining Moments

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**Thanks guys for the amazing response to this story! I really didn't expect this much so soon : ) **

**This is my biggest story with only three chapters in comparison to my others at this point. **

**This is my longest chapter yet sitting at 4420 so I hope you all enjoy. **

Callie's POV

I sit on the toilet with my head in my hands, my back throbbing slightly. I listen to the sound of Stef standing outside the door before moving across the hall into her room and the sound of water running moments later. I can't believe what I did last night… well I suppose technically this morning. I completely broke all my rules and broke down in front of a near complete stranger. I let her in past my walls, into stuff that I really didn't want her to know! It was like I just couldn't stop myself and everything just come rushing out like the dam walls had broken.

There is no way I can let it happen again. She wants to talk about some of the things I said but I just can't let her in any further than I already have. She already has enough ammunition against me that can really come back to haunt me.

I sit a few more moments before standing up and deciding I had best run myself a nice hot shower, relieve the aches and hopefully calm my nerves enough that I can keep the walls up better when Stef eventually corners me for the next conversation.

Just as I am about to turn the tap, I hear the phone begin to ring downstairs.

Jude.

I can't let Stef answer this call.

Without thinking I race out of the bathroom and down the back down the stairs, my back twinging at each step, thankfully my sock clad feet don't make too much noise on the wooden floors, and into the kitchen. The feeling that it is Jude on the other end of that line sends fingers of anxiousness up my spine, spreading goose bumps down my arms. He would never use the phone unless something is seriously wrong.

I glance back up towards the stairs before reaching to grab the phone from its cradle.

"Hello?" I whisper yell into the phone, hoping that I got the phone before Stef noticed it ringing and that she wouldn't hear this conversation.

"Callie!" Jude screams into the phone. "Callie! HELP!"

"Jude, baby, what's going on?!" I shout back without thinking, a cold sweat begins to form all over my body, panic making my body shake. I can hear the terror and tears in his voice. I can feel my hand curl into a fist beside me, my ragged nails digging sharply into my palm.

"Please Callie!" He begs. "He hurts!"

Before I can answer I hear the voice of my previous foster father in the background, loud and angry. The phone is dropped and I can hear the sound of flesh hitting flesh and the sound of Jude yelping and crying.

"JUDE!" I yell, hoping he can hear me, but just getting another scream and yell through the phone. "Baby, I'm coming!"

The phone slips from my hand, bouncing and cracking against the floor, as I race towards the door. I slip on a random pair of shoes and grab a handbag that the wallet is half hanging out of from beside the door and trip down the front steps. I'm running across the front lawn and down the street as I hear my name being called from inside the house.

Without glancing back I continue to sprint down the road, heading towards a taxi that I can see sitting there. I'm not sure what I would have done if it wasn't there but I hadn't really thought that far. Just as I throw the back door open, I look back and see Stef at the edge of her driveway, a shirt and trousers hastily thrown on by the look of the damp stains spreading across them and her still dripping hair.

"Callie!" She screams, her face a mixture of anger and panic.

I dive into the back of the taxi and slam the door shut behind me.

"San Ysidro!" I shout at the startled driver.

"But…" he starts, his face confused as he looks in his review mirror at Stef who is running down the street after us.

"Now!" I say, chucking a handful of notes, one or two being larger, found in the wallet, which is deemed to be Stef's by the license picture.

He quickly pulls out after glancing at the notes and I look back to see Stef three quarters of the way down the street. She slows as she notices the taxi pulling away, putting her hands on her head, her face stunned.

I settle back into my seat and my knee starts bouncing anxiously. I need to get to Jude. Who knows what could be happening to me and what condition I will find him in when I finally get there.

"Can we go any faster please?!" I shout to the driver.

Fishing through the wallet, I find another fifty dollar bill that is folded and stuffed into the side. Without even thinking I pull it out and chuck it into the pile of money that I have already given him, noticing another fifty and a twenty, with a few singles sitting there. I know that is more than what the fair is going to be but if it gets me there any quicker I don't care.

"Sure thing." He says, speeding up greatly having noticed the inordinate amount of money I have thrown at him. He furtively turns off the metre after setting a flat fare of $50 as he does, stashing one of the fifties and a twenty into his own pocket, leaving the rest to be put in his legitimately collected fairs.

"So, how is your day going?" He asks, a happy glint in his eyes.

I pointedly ignore him and look out the window. I can feel his eyes on me through the rear view mirror for a few moments before turning back to watch the road. I have given him a healthy bonus, the least he can do is not make shitty small talk.

I'm not sure how long it will take Stef to catch up to me. I suppose she could probably trace the number that rang her phone, considering it's obvious I was on it as it was still sitting on the kitchen floor when I ran out the door but I don't know how long that will take.

I squeeze my eyes shut, my hands curing into tight fists on my thighs. My head is pounding and my clothes are beginning to stick to me from the cool sweat that I was covered in while on the phone. The ache of my back that I had forgotten for those few moments is beginning to come back with a vengeance as the adrenalin begins to leave my body, sharp pains shooting up my back and down my legs. I must have landed a lot harder than I realised when I pushed myself away from Stef this morning.

Shame begins to bubble up and mix within my panic. I had sobbed in her lap like a child. I haven't done that since before I went into the foster system. I am sixteen. I shouldn't be crying on the lap of a woman who I don't even know. And then like a complete idiot, I dive off of her lap and hurt myself. Just topping off the whole situation so freaking perfectly.

I must tune out because suddenly the driver is asking me what address exactly he is supposed to be taken to. The address roles of my tongue without even a thought and I sit up higher to look out the window. The place looks the same as it always did.

I don't know why I thought it would have changed. Maybe because my views on it have changed so drastically that I thought there would have to be a physical difference.

Unrealistic I know.

"Wait!" I say and the driver swerves slightly as he turns to look at me quickly. "Can you just drop me off a few house down the street please?"

"Ah… yeah." He grumbles, turning down a few more streets before pulling to a stop a street away from my previous house.

Without saying another word I dive out of the taxi, figuring the hundred bucks I gave him would be thanks enough. He immediately drove away leaving me standing on the side of the road, realizing belatedly that I left Stef's bag sitting on the back seat. I can't seem to back myself feel the guilt that I probably should be feeling at this. I turn around slightly looking down towards the house that I ruined everything in.

I know I only have so long before Stef catches up to us and I need to work out what I am going to do and quickly.

It's mid-morning and I can't work out why Jude would still be at home at this time of day. He should be at school. And my foster father should be at work. The only reason he would let him stay at home would be if…. The thought sends fear down my spine. The only reason would be if Jude had visible bruises. The beating that I heard him taking this morning would have been too late for him to have to stay home because of it, he should have already been at school at that point.

But… but Jude told me that …

No he didn't say he hadn't done anything. Just that he hadn't been too bad. That means he has down something.

A large lump forms in my throat and I fight the urge that I need to be sick. Gasping, I bend over and lean my palms against my thighs, my hair falling in my face. Unwanted tears spring to my eyes and I force them back. I never used to cry. Tears showed weakness. Now I just can't seem to stop them.

I straighten up and begin to walk down the street and stop at the edge of the fence bordering his house. The house sits on the corner of the block so I have to be careful about how I approach it with both sides of the street being open to the windows.

I slowly creep towards the window that I know to be Jude's at the side of the house. Standing on tip toes, I can just see into the room.

Jude is laying on his bed, curled in a tight ball, his entire frame shaking. From the parts of his arms I can see, scrapes, cuts and bruises colour the pale white skin. Blood is tickling down slowly into a red pool on the white sheets underneath him.

The sight freezes me for a few moments before I lightly tap on the glass.

At first he doesn't appear to have any form of reaction to the sound but after a couple more taps he begins to stir. Slowly, as if in great pain, he lifts his head to look towards me. His lip is split and one of his eyes is swollen slightly. The eye that is open properly is blank but slowly a spark of recognition begins to grow in its depths.

He looks towards the door and into the hallway before carefully getting up off the bed. He limps over towards me and I can't stop the groan that slips from my mouth at the sight. He clutches his right arm to his chest as he does.

He slowly opens the window to prevent the screech that sounds if it moves too quickly.

"Oh … baby." I sigh. "I'm so sorry."

"It's fine." He answers, "It doesn't hurt too badly. And you are here now."

"Ok back up." I answer, ignoring the obvious lie of it not hurting too badly. "I'm coming in."

He shuffles backwards and with a great effort at my sore elbow and twinging back, I hoist myself up and into the room, slithering headfirst onto the floor. We both freeze and look towards the door to make sure that we haven't been noticed.

After a few moments, I think we have gone undiscovered and I slowly stand up and look at Jude fully. I quickly pull him into my arms, trying so hard to be gentle but still getting a slight wince out of him.

"I am so incredibly sorry baby." I whisper into his hair, smoothing a hand over it like I always do when he is upset. "Let me look at you."

I gently move him away from me, cupping his face with both of my hands. I gently smooth away the dried blood that is caked across his cheek.

"It's ok." He says, trying to avoid my eyes. "It doesn't hurt as bad as it did when he first did it."

"What happened?" I ask, not really wanting the answer but needing to hear it any way.

"I broke a dish when I was washing up before getting ready for school. He had already been in a bad mood and he was still drunk from last night, he got fired yesterday. He just went off. I managed to push him over and ring you… he didn't like that. I think he is still passed out in the lounge room right now." He says all this with his head hanging down, studiously ignoring me.

"Ok…" I sigh, formulating my plan in my head. If he is still passed out I might just be able to make it out with a few extra things. "Ok, you have your stuff packed right?"

He nods slightly and points to the cupboard. I quickly push him in the direction of the window while I open the cupboard door quietly.

"Get out the window." I tell him, noticing his confused expression. "I'm just going to get your stuff then quickly go get mine."

"Callie…" He starts but I shake my head at him. I push the bag into his hands and push him to the window.

"I need you to wait down the street for me ok baby." I pull back the blinds further for him to be able to climb out without rustling them. "In that little park."

He studies me for a few moments before nodding his head, realising there is no point fighting me. I quickly help him to balance on the window sill, going out backwards with me lowering him as far as I can before dropping him the half a foot further to the ground. I gently toss his bag down after him.

Just as I go to tell him to be careful, I see a look of terror in his eyes before a sharp pain is sent through my scalp as a large hand grabs a tight handful of my hair and pulls me back sharply.

"RUN JUDE!" I scream, as a beefy arm wraps itself around my stomach and pulls me into a hot sweaty body.

"What the fuck are you doing back in my house?" He yells into my ear, his warm, stale smelling breath pooling over my face and making me gag.

"I just…" I begin but before I can finish I am shoved across the room.

The sudden movement only gives me split seconds to move my hands up to protect my head before I slam against the wall and crumple in a heap to the floor. The air is knocked for my lungs in a great rush and I can feel myself gasping to get more air.

"I told you what I would do if I ever showed your face here again." He snarls, his large body looming over me.

I barely have a moment to protect myself before a large booted foot is connecting with my ribs, sending whatever air I had managed to regain straight out of my lungs again, leaving my lungs screaming. The hair on top of my head is once again pulled by the roots as he sharply tugs me up to shove me back into the wall.

I barely manage to stay on my feet, not wanting to get anywhere near his feet again. I sag slightly against the wall, trying to keep him in my line of sights.

"You knew what you were risking by coming here." He sneers, his face a mask of hatred. "I warned you."

"Jude… he g-got out of this… with… without… getting hurt anymore." I gasp brokenly. "I don't c-care what… what you do to… to me anymore. He will be safe in… in the new h-home."

He roars at me, sending quick punches to the side of my head and chest, sending me back to the ground. He wastes no time laying the boots into my stomach and ribs, occasionally hitting my arms and legs as well as I weakly try to protect myself.

Weakly I send out a quick kick and am pleased to feel it connect with his shin. He cries out in pain and I realise it must have been stronger than I thought. I quickly scramble to my hands and knees and quickly shuffle away.

I am just reaching the hallway when something crashes into my back, sending sharp pains through my body and sending me flat to the floor again. I roll slowly to my back, realising that a lamp is smashed beside me.

I don't get a chance to register anymore before he grabs my arm and drags me into the lounge room, straining the tendons in my arm. I grit my teeth against the pain that I can feel, the whole of my body on fire with it. I refuse to give him the satisfaction of making a noise of pain, knowing that is really all he wants.

He stops and drops my arm. I allow it to thump loudly and painfully against the ground, unable to muster the strength in order to stop the extra pain.

I have a second to breath before he once again has a handful of my hair as he reefs me into a sitting position, crouching down in front of me.

"What the hell are you doing back here?!" He snaps, spit flying out of his mouth and splattering my face.

"Getting Jude away from you." I growl back at him. "I already told you that dumbass."

I know that I am playing with fire here but I can't bring myself to stop the words from leaving my mouth. My body feels too weak and in pain to physically fight back so all I have left are my words.

"You little bitch!" He snarls, bouncing my head off the floor, sending me reeling.

My head is spinning and bright star bursts in front of my eyes. I feel my body slump fully and my limbs grow heavy. He stands up and turns away from me. I know I should take the opportunity to do something but I can't make myself move for the life of me.

Just as he goes to turn back to me, the sound of sirens can be heard coming down the street. My body relaxes completely.

Stef is here. Jude will be safe.

I can hear my foster father growling but the words aren't registering in my head. My eyes slip closed against my will and I can feel myself begin to drift but I don't have the energy to fight it.

Suddenly I feel myself being yanked from the floor and once again enclosed in a beefy arm against a sweaty chest, my arms pinned to my sides. A cool metal object is placed against my temple and it takes me longer than it should to realize that it is a gun.

My eyes snap open and I struggle weakly against him but he just lifts me up so my feet dangle above the ground giving me nothing to push against to fight him.

"Struggle again and you get a bullet through your brain you little bitch." He growls harshly in my ear. "Just give me a reason."

I go limp in his arms and his arm squeezes tighter against me to compensate for the sudden dead weight, the gun jamming tighter against my head.

I can hear voices shouting from outside but none of them are really making much sense to my addled brain. I think I may have a concussion.

"She was trespassing on my property!" He screams, his voice the only one that's clear due to it being right in my ear. "I deserve to be able to punish her!"

Suddenly the door bursts open and a couple more guns are trained towards me. The noises behind us give me a reason to think that there are more back there as well.

My foster father spins stupidly before dragging me to the other side of the room so his back is against the wall, leaving me as his human shield to the five guns that pointed at us.

"Come any closer and I will blow the bitches brain out!" He screams, shaking my roughly, my legs swinging limply like those of a ragdoll.

I can hear multiple voices in the room but all I can make out sounds like buzzing bees to me. The delirious feeling I have, unsettles me greatly and I want, no, need to be able to tell what is going on.

I weakly raise my head slightly and look up, my head heavy against my weak neck and try to make sense of the fuzzy image of the police in front of us. They are all in defensive stances, their arms raising guns stiffly, none of them moving at all. I can't seem to make the image of their faces come in clearly and for some reason I long to be able to see the kind, caring face that I know is Stefs, the image brought to the forefront of my mind from the blond hair of one of the cops standing in the back slightly.

Blinking a few more times, I finally clear some of the static from my vision and realise that the blond hair actually does belong to Stef. Her weapon is trained on the man behind me but she only has eyes for me. Although the rest of the police are mostly focusing on my foster father, their faces angry, her features are a mask of worry, her eyes alive with panic.

My foster father his shaking my again and my head snaps back against his chest sharply, a crack sounding from my neck, before lolling forward, my chin resting on my own chest. I can't work up the energy to lift it again. The sounds of multiple voices are screaming through my ears, making my head throb.

Suddenly I am being thrown forward and the crack of a gunshot is sounding. I feel something slam into my shoulder before I crumble limply in a heap to the ground, my already bruised head bouncing off of the floor once again.

It takes me a few moments to realize the burning fire that has taken over the place that used to be my shoulder, a scream ripping itself from my throat. The sound raw and primal, hurting my own ears, my throat feels tight.

I can feel hands rolling me and the burning increases as the press down forcefully against my shoulder. I look down to see a bright red stain spreading itself across the grey t-shirt that I am wearing. The sight oddly fascinating. Vaguely, the thought that it is Stef's and I am still in sleeping clothes drifts across my mind.

Stef!

My eyes dart around the room searching for her before the land on her leaning over me, making me realise that they are her hands pressing so tightly against my shoulder. Her messy blond hair has fallen out of her bun slightly and is hanging down around her face as she looks down at me. Tears are sliding down her face and dripping onto me. Her mouth is moving but I can't seem to hear the words she is saying.

I can hear a small whimpering sound and it takes me a moment to realize that the sound is coming from me, but I can't seem to stop them.

I can feel my breath coming in pants, not seeming to be able to get enough oxygen to my lungs or into my blood to make my brain be able to work properly.

My eyes begin to drift closed and I welcome the feeling. I am suddenly so exhausted that the idea of sleep is highly wanted.

Hands shake me and my eyes snap open and meet with Stef's hazel eyes. Pure fear is reflected back at me. I feel bad for making her feel that way. I never meant for this to happen. I was supposed to be in and out.

The image of Jude's Skippy the Turtle back pack being dropped out a window flashes to mind and I begin to struggle to sit up. Multiple hands are quickly on my body, holding me down. Stef's mouth is again moving and I force myself to tune into her words.

"Callie," She sobs. "Please honey, stay still."

"J…Jude!" I manage to croak, the feat a lot harder than I think it should be.

"He's ok, sweets." She whispers. "He's outside in my car."

I try to nod my head but I can't seem to move it. I realise that two hands are framing my face, their fingers spanning across my jaw, up to my ears and down my neck, holding my head still. I can't see the person who is doing it. I wonder why they are, I mean it's my shoulder that is hurt isn't it?

The thought that something isn't registering floats into consciousness but before I can grab a hold of the idea and think about it, it's gone.

I look at Stef again and realise that once again she is talking to me but her words seem to be muffled, like I am sitting at the bottom of a swimming pool and she is standing at the edge yelling in to me.

For some reason that thought is really funny to me.

I can feel my eyes begin to slide closed again and I try to fight to keep them open and the terrified look that crosses Stef's face but it is a losing battle.

My eyes close fully and I slide gratefully into the peaceful darkness that is waiting for me.

**A/N bet you guys didn't see that one coming. Hope you guys enjoyed this chapter and please read and review. I will begin to write the next chapter as soon as I can but I am not sure how much writing I will be able to do in the next week considering things that have happened in my town recently. **

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	5. Chapter 5

The Defining Moments

Stef's POV

I have been standing in the shower for a few minutes. I finish rinsing the conditioner from my hair just as I hear a muffled noise. I stand still for a moment before continuing to wash rinse my hair thoroughly thinking it is just Callie in the next bathroom.

Suddenly there is a shout from downstairs and I instantly work to turn off the shower and dive out of the shower. I go to reach for a towel when I hear another shout.

"JUDE!" Callie's voice screams. "Baby, I'm coming!"

I scramble into my bedroom slipping slightly against the wet tiles and dive across the room to my cupboard pulling them open quickly.

I randomly pull out a pair of trousers and a t-shirt and hastily pull them on, the material sticking to my still dripping skin. I race out of the room and head for the stairs.

As I reach the top of them I see the door being opened and Callie flying out, my handbag in her hand and my runners on her feet.

"Callie!" I yell after her.

Tripping down the stairs, I sprint across the foyer and out the door and onto the front lawn. Callie is already nowhere to be seen in the yard and I sprint to the edge of the driveway to look up the street.

Callie has sprinted three quarters of the way up the road and she is heading straight towards an idling taxi. She looks back at me as she throws open the door, she pauses for a moment, I can just make out the defiance on her face, yet there is also a large amount of terror mixed in.

"Callie!" I scream, I can hear the panic in my voice.

She jumps into the cab and I push myself to sprint just that little bit faster, I am nearly there when the taxi pulls away from the curb and speeds off. I slow down and put my hands on my head, my breath coming fast.

"Shit!" I mutter under my breath as I watch the car round the corner a half dozen blocks away.

I turn and run back to the house, moving slightly slower than my previous sprint. When I get into the kitchen, I notice the phone sitting on the floor, the plastic casing cracked slightly. I quickly pick it up, to find that it isn't working.

"Shit!" I say a bit louder than on the street.

I turn around and quickly grab my phone from the charger on the opposite bench top. I dial the number to the police station and tap my fingers impatiently on the island beside me.

"San Diego Police Department, Officer Foster speaking." Mike's voice answers after five rings.

"Mike, it's Stef!" I shout inadvertently into the phone. "I need you to trace the number that just called my home phone and get me an address."

"What?" Mike answers, confusing colouring his tone.

"Mike, I don't have time to explain." I snap. "It is incredibly important that you run this number now!"

"Ok!" He says, "Ok, just give me a moment."

"Thanks."

My foot begins to tap impatiently as I hear Mike working the keyboard through the phone line.

"Ok," Mike answers, "It's a San Ysidro area code. The actual address will take a bit longer."

"Mike, I need you to put someone else on your computer and come pick me up." I answer. "I'm supposed to be on duty now, I'll dress in uniform and we will head that way."

"Give me about ten minutes." His voice is confused but he knows not to question me when I am like this.

I race up the stairs and quickly pull on my uniform, strapping my belt around my waist and attaching my gun and holster to the side. I am running back down the stairs as I hear the police cruiser pull up in the driveway. I run through the door, pulling it closed behind me and jump into the passenger seat.

"Let's go." I say, a little louder than I meant to.

Mike pulls out of the driveway and moves down the street. I can feel him taking sideways glances at me as my fingers tap anxiously on the window ledge. We drive in silence for about another ten minutes before I hear him take in a deep breath.

"Wanna tell me what's going on?" He asks, taking another look at me.

"We took in a foster girl last night," I answer with a sigh. "She broke down last night, saying what happened at her previous foster family. It wasn't good. Anyway, this morning when I went to get in the shower before calling in to say I'd be off today, I heard her yelling from downstairs. I think she was talking to her brother. Before I could get down there, she was gone."

"Seriously Stef?" He growls. "You don't even know this girl, why do you care?"

"Jesus, Mike!" I snarl. "I don't need to know her to know that she is seriously in trouble. I have a really bad feeling in the pit of my stomach."

He goes to say something else but cuts himself off when I glare at him harshly. I have no patience for his thoughts on me and Lena apparently "taking in strays". He always inadvertently insults my children and I am seriously starting to get sick of it.

I can see him about to say something when I call comes through the radio.

"Calls of a disturbance in at 56 Louisiana Avenue, San Ysidro. " Crackles over the radio. "All available units are requested, history of violence in the house, early reports say a firearm could be involved. A young girl is inside."

My heart stutters and suddenly it is hard to breathe, a large ball forms in my throat.

"Callie!" I gasp.

I grab for the radio, my numb fingers fumbling it slightly.

"This is unit two Adam twenty, we are in response. Eta five minutes." I shout into the phone and flick on the sirens.

With a brief glance at me, Mike puts his foot harder on the accelerator and we surge forward, cars moving out of our direct path. I hear the radio continue to crackle as more units are responding to the call. The fingers of my right hand are grasping the door handle, ready to fling the door open the moment the car stops.

"You do realise this could be unrelated to anything to do with this girl." Mike mutters from the driver's seat.

"A mother knows Mike." I growl back, my throat tight.

"Oh come off it Stef!" His voice grows harsher. "You have known her for less than a day. You are nowhere near her mother."

I ignore his comment as we round corner and follow the line of police cars to the house on the corner. I dive out of the car and move up to the constable standing next to the sidewalk.

"What's going on?" I say as I get close enough for him to hear me.

"He has a young girl inside, he just pulled the gun. We have a narrow view through a crack in the curtains but no clear shot. An entry team is getting ready now in case negotiations go sour." He answers me, is voice a practiced calm.

"Where did the reports come from?" I ask, looking at the commotion around me.

"A woman from down the street." He answers turning to point in that general direction. "A young boy came running down the street screaming for help. Saying he was going to kill her. The kid is covered in bruises."

My body begins to shake as I slowly back away from him, looking towards the house, knowing now for certain that it is Callie enclosed in those walls. I turn around and find a boy being held back on the other side of the street. His face is bruised and his features a mask of terror. I run over there and pull him to me.

"Jude?" I whisper, smoothing my hands over his head, the way I did to Callie, what feels like another life time ago.

"Please help her!" He sobs, tears streaming down his cheeks. "I never meant her to get stuck behind after getting me!"

"I'm going to make sure she is ok, I promise." I whisper, pulling him to me tighter once more before gently pushing him back to a female officer that I don't recognise. "Sit with him in the back of my car. Keep him occupied and away from the house."

She nods before putting her hand on his shoulder and leading him to my car. I wrap my arms around myself, trying to calm myself down before turning back towards the house. I slowly walk across the street and step onto the grass outside the house. I put my hand on my gun at my hip and move to the line of the entry team that is lined up around the side of the house. They acknowledge me with a brief nod before turning to face the door, ready for the orders.

"Mr Nigels!" He shouts through a megaphone that seemingly appeared from nowhere.

There is no answer from inside.

"Mr Nigels! You need to let the girl go!" He tries again.

Again there is no answer.

"Mr Nigels, if you don't come out we will be forced to come in." He tries once again.

It takes a few moments but there is an answering yell.

"She was trespassing on my property!" He screams, his voice harsh. "I deserve to be able to punish her!"

The commander gives the nod and we force our way through the door. Through all the commotion it takes me a few moments to make sense of the scene in front of me, but when I do, my heart stops in my chest.

Callie is slumped against a beefy arm wrapped around her chest, the cut on her lip from Juvie reopened, a large gash on the side of her head bleeding profusely, red finger prints blooming into bruises on the pale skin of her arms. Her eyes are unfocused, heavily glazed, one of them beginning to swell shut. But the thing that terrifies me the most is the revolver that is pressed tightly against her temple.

My gun is trained on the man standing behind her but I can't take my eyes off of the girl he is using as a human shield. My heart begins to beat so hard I feel like it might burst out of my chest. The officers around me are shouting at him but I can't really make out the words.

"Come any closer and I will blow the bitches brain out!" He screams, shaking her roughly, her body hanging limply in his grasp.

He has dragged her backwards, her feet dragging, until his back is against the wall, so no one can sneak up behind him. Callie raises her head slowly, her eyes lazily dancing over the officers in front of me, seemingly unable to focus on anyone of them. Her gaze lands on me and after a few tired blinks a spark of recognition flares slightly within the brown depths of her eyes.

She holds my gaze for a few moments before he begins shaking her, her head snapping back sharply, making a breath catch in my throat.

"No!" He screams, spit flying out of her mouth.

Suddenly he is pushing her forwards and she stumbles, her body slumping like a marionette with its strings cut. The sound of the gun firing cracks through the air.

I watch as she crumples to the ground, her head bouncing sickeningly against the carpeted floor. I rush forward, falling hardly to my knees next to her, a cold sweat covering my body at the sight of the blood red stain blooming across the shoulder of my grey pyjama t-shirt that I realise she is still wearing. I press my hands hard against the wound, feeling her body tense underneath me. Her warm blood bubbles up around my fingers and my stomach reels at the feeling. Her head rolls to the side, her eyes focusing on the sight of the blood seeping across the material despite my best efforts to stem the bleeding.

"I'm here Callie." I say as her eyes dart around the room, a panicked look in them. "I'm right here with you, I'm going to make sure you're ok sweets."

Small droplets of water are darkening the grey material and I realise with a start that tears are streaming down my face. The sound of her whimpering sends chills down my spine.

"It's ok baby girl." I whisper to her, her eyes glassy with tears that are beginning to slide down into her hair. "I promise it is going to be ok. You're going to be ok."

Her breath is beginning to come in quick pants, her chest heaving under my hands. Mike is holding either side of her head, making sure she doesn't move and aggravate any injuries. I give him a brief glance, noticing the sadness on his features, before turning back to Callie.

Her eyes are beginning to slip closed.

"Callie!" I yell, my voice cracking with terror, shaking her body slightly. "Callie, honey I need you to keep your eyes open!"

She moves her eyes back to me slowly, they are becoming less and less focused the longer we are here.

"Where is the damn ambulance?!" I shout to the room in general.

"A minute off." An officer behind me mumbles.

I turn my eyes back to Callie, pushing tighter on her wound that is still spilling blood. Her glassy eyes begin to drift around the room and suddenly she is struggling under my hands. Mike tightens his grip and a few other officers move in to hold her limbs still. I realise she is trying to sit up.

"Callie," I sob my voice tight. "Please honey, stay still."

"J…Jude!" She croaks, the words strained and tired.

"He's ok, sweets." I whisper. "He's outside in my car."

Her eyes roll back to me sleepily, she tries to nod her head before realising that Mike has a hold of her.

"I promise he is ok, he is being kept safely outside." I tell her, "He can come home with us and you two will never be separated again I promise."

Her eyes are beginning to become glazed, the spark in their depths at the mention of Jude being safe starting to fade away. The lids beginning to slide closed once more.

"Callie, baby!" I say, shaking her again. "Please open your eyes!

Her eyes fully close and I can feel her chest stop moving under my hands.

"CALLIE!" I scream.

Suddenly paramedics are sliding in next to me. Their hands moving mine out of the way, quickly and efficiently, one of them straps a bandage to her shoulder and begins pumping on her chest while the other moves the AMBU bag over her mouth, squeezing breaths into her lungs.

I can feel Mike moving in beside me, his arms enclosing me and moving me away but a dig my heels into the ground.

"Come on Stef." He mutters into my ear. "There is nothing more you can do here."

"I'm not leaving her." I gasp, my lungs seemingly void of air. "I need to be with her."

He lets me go, realising that he can't make me leave. He reaches behind him at a voice and then he taps on my arm gently. I look down dazedly and realise he is holding out a crisp white towel to me. It takes me a while to reach out and grab it, unsure as to why I need it. As I grasp it, I suddenly realise why.

Callie's blood is smeared all over my hands, and up my arms, the red bright and stark against my skin.

Suddenly I am gasping, roughly moving the material against my skin, rubbing so hard but unable to get enough of it off.

"Get it off!" I rasp, the towel turning red but still too much blood on my hands. "Get it off of me!"

Mike's hands are grabbing mine and pulling me into his chest. He takes the towel out of my hands and wraps it around them with his own, rubbing them gently and murmuring soft words to me that I can't make out over the pounding of my heart beat in my ears.

The paramedics are still working on Callie and I can't take my eyes off of her. Officers slowly and gently move her onto a back board, under the instructions of the paramedics and lift her onto a gurney that has appeared in the room. A hard collar has been wrapped around her neck, a tube snaking its way into her mouth and down her throat, the paramedic steadily squeezing the AMBU bag, her chest rising and falling with each one under the hands of the other paramedic as he continues to push on her chest.

The bandage on her shoulder is already a bright red.

The paramedic puts his fingers to her throat, the skin ghostly white with blood lose. He pauses for a moment before nodding his head and saying, "We have a pulse."

The begin to roll the gurney towards the door. I sit up with a jolt and I can feel myself stumble to my feet, Mike's hands fluttering around me, trying to help me up.

"Can I ride along with her please?" I manage to rasp out. "I need to be with her."

They nod and I follow them outside. The sun glares into my eyes and I am surprised that it is still daylight.

"Bring Jude to the hospital and call Lena." I say over my shoulder to Mike, who I know has followed me out.

I don't wait for an answer as I climb into the ambulance behind Callie. I sit down in the seat that the paramedic gestures to and realise with a start that I am clutching the towel in my hands, not noticing that I had taken it from Mike.

The other paramedic closes the doors and makes his way to the front the rig. The siren starts and we are pulling away from the scene.

I lean forward and pull Callie's hand into my own, trying to ignore the red that is staining my skin pink, the crevices around my nails a bright red.

"Please," I whisper. "You need to stay with me Callie."

I pull her hand gently to my lips and place a soft kiss on the cool skin.

"I need you to stay alive." I whisper against her skin.

I lean my elbows against my knees, and while still gripping Callie's hand in one, I put my chin in the other, suddenly finding it too hard to keep my own head up. I can feel myself rocking with the movement of the ambulance, the wailing of the sirens deafening me.

I do something that I haven't done in a long time.

I pray.

**A/n Sorry that this took so long guys, with everything happening lately I haven't had the time or the inclination to actually write this chapter. But with a 3000 word chapter I hope that it makes up for it. Please read and review guys.**

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	6. Chapter 6

The Defining Moments

**A/N I am not going to apologise for this taking so long, because personal circumstances, with two funerals in the space of nine days, will throw any one of balance. But I will try to make this a long chapter any way. **

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Stef's POV

The ambulance pulls up with a jolt and I fall forward slightly, the blood stained towel slipping from between my fingers, pooling gently on the floor. I am mesmerised by the red quarter moons at the base of my fingernails, the sight horrifying when I remember where it came from.

The blood of a broken young girl lying, her body limp, before me.

Despite only knowing her for less than twenty four hours, the connection I feel with her, is so strong. So incredibly strong that I can feel my body ache with the knowledge that she is hurt, that she has been hurt so severely in the past. That she had to grow up so soon, an adult before her time. Forced into a system that has done nothing but reinforce the idea that she is nothing, less than nothing.

I start slightly and look up at the sound of a throat clearing beside me and realise that Callie isn't there anymore, that in my distraction she had already been unloaded from the back of the ambulance, a horde of hospital workers swirling around her. A young red headed nurse is standing at the back of the ambulance, her hand reaching out towards me, her green eyes studying my features, the emotion in her eyes hard to figure out in my addled brain.

"Officer?" she murmurs, slowly moving into the back of the rig with me. Her movements reminding me of how I acted with Callie just the night before, like I am a skittish animal that she doesn't want to spook. "My name is Ana. If you come inside, we can see about getting news on Miss Jacobs."

I stare at her blankly for a few moments, unable to truly comprehend what she is saying with my eyes constantly drifting back to my pink stained hands and forearms, the blood dried and stiff against my skin, despite my best efforts to scrub my skin clean with the towel at my feet while on route here.

"Ma'am," Ana says, her voice stern yet gentle, trying to make me break out of my head. "I need you to take deep breaths for me."

I realise that my breath is coming in short, sharp gasps, and my hands are beginning to shake, a cold sweat forming all over my body, my uniform feeling like it's choking me, my chest burning. I begin rubbing at my skin with my hands, my skin clammy.

"I need to get it off!" I say, my voice shaking and gasping, barely audible. "It needs to come off! GET IT OFF OF ME!

Ana moves quickly and gently grasps my hands between hers, obscuring my vision of my skin.

"I need some help out here!" She shouts behind her out the still open doors.

I try to pull away from her, to continue scratching at my skin to get it off, but I can't seem to control my body, my limbs feeling heavy. My vision begins to blur, black spots forming right before me, cutting me further off from the outside world. My chest continues to tighten with the lack of oxygen coming from my gasping breaths. The feeling scares me even more and my heart begins to race even faster.

I can hear voices yelling from the entrance to the emergency room and I can feel the young nurse slipping her slight arm around me, gripping my waist tightly while draping my arm across her narrow shoulders. She shifts slightly and my weight slumps against her. She doesn't even stumble slightly. She is stronger than her small stature would allude to. She slowly moves me to the mouth of the ambulance and the waiting gurney and team of people. She moves my body to lean against a black headed, blue eyed man in scrubs who has suddenly appeared beside me before she lightly jumps out of the rig before turning back and grabbing both of my hands. She and the black headed man, with the help of another, blond headed man, gently manoeuvre me onto solid ground. She steadies me slightly as I stumble, her slight arm wrapping around my waist and allowing my weight to fall against her once again.

I feel myself begin to fall and Ana's arm tightens around me, and the black and blond haired man grab my legs and swing my body up onto a gurney that has been wheeled up beside me. I can tell they are speaking about me, Ana's mouth moving, reeling off what I know would be my symptoms, and the others are responding but all I can hear is a ringing in my ears, the sound blocking out everything else. It scares me when Ana's face morphs into a look of stark concern as she looks down at me, her mouth moving once again, I am assuming asking me something that I will never be able to answer.

I think the gurney starts to move faster underneath me.

I can feel my hands running down my chest and over my stomach and vaguely realise that they are unbuttoning my shirt, and untucking it from my uniform pants, leaving me in my white singlet underneath. The brief glimpse of the blood soaked garment after it is slid out from underneath me turns my stomach, and suddenly I am choking. I can feel myself being rolled on my side and a basin is shoved under my mouth as whatever is in my stomach is expelled violently. Hands are holding my shoulders steady as I feel the gurney begin to move underneath me again, after a few moments as my retching stops, as I hadn't eaten since yesterday evening leaving barely anything to be brought up. I can feel my body shaking, my body feeling weak as I am laid back down on the gurney, still on my side. A new basing placed bedside me, as my chest tightens once again.

I am wheeled into a bay in the emergency room that is noisy and full of rushing people. A white cloth is wiped over my mouth and face before a mask is placed over my mouth and nose and I vaguely realise my head is being lifted as something tightens around my head. A steady flow of oxygen begins to move through the mask and into me, my breaths still gasping. I can feel gentle hands slowly rolling me onto my back again and I realise that they are cutting my white singlet open, pulling apart and leaving me exposed in just my white cotton bra, simple and unassuming for work. I can't seem to find the energy to care about being exposed in such a crowded area. A couple of those sticky pads are stuck to my chest and attached to wires that thread back to a machine that starts beeping, a blood pressure cuff is tightened around my arm, almost painfully, and a clip is attached to my finger. Immediately the sounds of alarms coming from the machine mix in with the ringing in my ears, making it impossible for me to focus on anything the people around me are saying.

I can see Ana still standing beside me, her eyes flicking from me to the machines every few moments, her mouth moving rapidly. My eyes dart around, watching the people around me, their faces tense as another nurse brings a tub of water over and begins to wipe my hands and arms. I can't feel the strength to lift my head to see what she is doing. My head is too fuzzy and I can't seem to figure out why she would be doing that until the cloth comes away with pink stains.

The blood that is still on my skin.

My stomach heaves again, and I must have made a noise as I am rolled quickly onto my side again, the oxygen mask being ripped from my face, the basin once again shoved under my mouth. I dry heave for a few moments, with nothing left in my stomach, before I am rolled back over and the oxygen mask is placed over my mouth once again.

My head is held still and Ana's face looms other me. Her mouth is moving and I force myself to focus on the sound of her voice that I can vaguely hear over the ringing in my ears.

"It's ok, you're ok." She murmurs to me, her voice soft and gentle. "You were in shock and now suffering from a panic attack. I need you to slow your breathing down for me. We need to calm you down. Just focus on me, and copy my breathing ok."

She slowly breaths in and out and I slowly make myself copy her, focusing on only her kind face that is above me. Her hands are gently smoothing over my face and hair, her soft voice still murmuring to me.

I can feel my chest begin to loosen as my breathing slows and I can feel my heart begin to slow. I am not sure how long it takes, though I know it's a while, but finally the alarms on the machines around me stop, which immediately makes my head clearer.

"Pulse-Ox is up from 87% to 95%. And HR has stabilised, down from 130 to 90. Still high but better." Someone states, his voice calm. "We're in the clear."

Ana stays with me as the others walk away to other cases. She continues to fiddle with the machines beside me, adjusting them before turning back to me.

I look back to Ana, and she smiles at me. Her shoulders relaxing and her expression calming as she realises that I appear to be more aware.

"Welcome back officer." She says, her voice gentle, her hand squeezing mine. "You had us worried there for a moment."

"S-Stef." I stutter, trying to sit up, my hands reaching up to pull the oxygen mask off of my face.

"Well Stef," Ana answers, pressing a button to raise the head of my bed. She reaches to lean me forward slightly as she places a plump white pillow behind my head. "How are you feeling?"

"Better," I mutter, looking down at myself, realising fully for the first time that my uniform top has been taken away and my singlet cut open down the middle, leaving my bra out for full view. "Although slightly exposed."

"Yeah sorry about that, tight clothing is always a disadvantage in these cases." Ana laughs, "I'll get you a scrub top to put on."

I nod and she turns away from me and walks to the other side of the room and through a door to what looks like a storage area. She disappears from view for a few moments before she returns to view with a blue scrub top clutched in her right hand. She goes to move over to me but another doctor stops her, touching her forearm and leaning in to talk to her. He says a few things before a look of understanding crosses her face. She nods, saying something back to him before she turns and walks back over to me.

"Thanks." I murmur, as she hands me the scrub top, slipping the ruined singlet away from my shoulders and slowly sitting up further to slide the scrub top over my chest and down my stomach to cover myself.

"Feel better?" Ana asks, grabbing the oxygen mask that is still sitting beside me and hanging it up behind my head.

I nod and lean back against the bed, my eyes scanning the room briefly before turning back to face the green-eyed nurse. She is studying me, trying to make it discrete as she fills in things on a chart from the end of my bed.

"What's…." I begin and then suddenly it hits me.

Panic floods me once again as I leap up out of the bed, my feet stumbling underneath me, my head spinning at the quickness of my movement. An alarm sounds behind me as I feel a pulling at my chest, the cords pulling off of the stickers.

Ana catches me quickly, once again surprising me at the strength her little body holds.

"Stef!" She shouts. "It's ok! I need you to get back on the bed."

"CALLIE!" I scream, trying to pull away from Ana. "Callie! Where is she? Is she ok?!"

The same black haired man from earlier races over and helps Ana push me back onto the gurney. I begin to struggle against them, needing to see Callie, my breath once again gasping.

All rational thoughts gone from my mind.

"Stef, listen to me!" Ana yells at me, holding my shoulders against the bed, as the man holds my legs down. "Callie is in surgery, she was stabilised as much as she could be before being taken away to surgery."

"I- there was so much blood!" I sob, my hands clutching the side of my head.

"I know." She says, her voice strained as she holds my struggling body down, yet trying to sound calm. "And I know it must have been scary seeing your daughter like that, but she has the best team of surgeons working on her and I promise that they are going to do everything they can. She will have been given blood transfusions and they will do their best to fix her shoulder."

My body slumps against the bed and Ana and the man cautiously let me go after a few tense moments. I draw my knees up to my chest and bury my face in my arms. My shoulders shaking under the force of my sobs. It is quiet for few moments before I feel slim arms wrap themselves around my shoulders, pulling me against a warm body, calm murmurs being whispered above me.

She gently leans me back onto the bed and replaces the cords to the stickers on my chest. She presses a few buttons on the machine before turning back to me, still murmuring calm words to me.

A familiar sounding voice is heard from somewhere behind me and the whispering stops and I can feel Ana pull away from me. I keep my head turned away until I can feel a hand squeeze my forearm slightly. I slowly look up into Ana's gentle green eyes, her red hair is curling around her face, loose from her bun.

"Your wife is here Stef." She murmurs at me, her eyes still cautious. "Would you like her to come here?"

I nod and pull away from her, realising with a start that there are wet patches on my skin. I slowly wipe my face and eyes and realise that I have been crying.

"She really wants to see you." She whispers, looking behind her again.

I nod and move back to lean my head back on the pillow, suddenly feeling very tired.

Ana nods her head and then suddenly Lena is there, pulling my into her arms and wrapping me tightly against her warm chest, her cheek pressed against the top of my head. Her body shaking as I realise that she is sobbing, wet patches forming in my hair.

I slowly wrap my arms around her waist, my face buried in the crook or her neck.

"I was so worried!" Her normally calm voice gasps. "Mike rang and told me that Callie had been hurt and that you were riding with her to the ambulance. And I got here as quickly as I could, but when I asked to see you, they told me that they were working on you at the present moment and that I had to wait. Mike said you weren't hurt! What happened?"

I try to answer her but I can't seem to think of any words to say to explain what just happened and I end up just gaping like a fish.

"She came in, in a state of shock." A voice sounds from behind me, Ana's. "When I tried to get her to follow me out of the ambulance she begins to have a panic attack. It was severe but we managed to get it under control and she is fine now. She just needs to stay here for a bit so we can monitor her just to make sure everything is under control."

I nod gratefully at her as Lena loosens her grip slightly before pulling me back to her.

"Oh honey." Lena whispers, pressing her lips to my hair. "What happened at the house?"

I shake my head, unable to put voice the horror of what I saw. The bruises, the yells, the look in her eyes… the blood.

"Jude?" I whisper, suddenly remembering the young boy covered in bruises who had called for help.

"Your partner is with him up in the child wing." Ana answers. "He has a slight concussion and bruising but no serious injury has been found."

I let out a sigh of relief, glad that despite how bad he looked, he was going to be ok.

"Jude?" Lena's rasping voice says above me. "Callie's brother?"

"He rang her this morning." I murmur into her chest. "She ran away after he called."

"At least he is out now." Lena whispers into my hair.

"Not without getting hurt first." I murmur. "But at least… at least he didn't… didn't s-s-shoot him."

I stutter, my voice breaking as suddenly I am in tears again, my chest heaving with sobs.

"Callie… was shot?" Lena voices, her voice rising in question at the end.

My chest starts to tighten as once again my breaths start to come in gasps, and my head begins to spin.

"What's going on?" Lena yells, her voice panicked.

Ana rushes forward, pulling me out of Lena's grasp and pushes me back against the bed, reaching to grab the oxygen mask before placing it over my mouth once again.

"Just take nice, deep breaths Stef." She says, her voice perpetually calm. "It's ok. You're ok, Callie is going to be ok, and Jude is ok. It's all ok."

I grasp her forearm with my hand as her hand still holds the mask over my nose and mouth.

"She is still in shock, and with the panic attack, it is best not to broach painful subjects right now. At least not until we get an update on everyone's condition." Ana murmurs to Lena, who is wringing her hands with anxiety behind her.

Lena nods slightly, a small ringlet falling over her forehead.

Once my breathing has slowed down again, Ana gently removes the mask from my face and replaces it on the hook behind the bed. She looks back at me, smiling slightly.

"I am going to head back to the nurses station now that things have calmed down in here and leave you two alone." She says, softly. "Call me if you need anything."

"Thank you Ana." I whisper, my voice rough.

"Just doing my job." She smiles and turns away, walking away.

She draws the curtain around us for privacy as she goes. Lena slowly moves closer to me, her hands fidgeting at her side from nerves.

"Can I sit with you?" She asks.

I nod, and she slowly moves to sit on the bed beside me before curling up next to me.

"Where are my babies?" I whisper, realising that if she is here, she must have pulled them out of school too.

"I took them to the cafeteria before coming here. I told them to stay there until I called for them." She answers, her hand stroking my arm gently. "They were worried but I figured it would be easier if I found out what was going on first. Probably a good thing considering."

I nod slightly, suddenly ashamed of my reaction. I am a trained police officer, I am trained to keep my cool in all situations and I can't keep my cool enough to get out of a damn ambulance without freaking out.

"Babe, it's ok." Lena murmurs, her hand moving to brush my hair back from my forehead, smoothing it across my head. "I don't know what happened, but it seems like it was a valid reaction to whatever happened."

Before I can answer her, the curtain is swept back.

Ana is standing there with a doctor beside her, a scrub cap on his head, his face grim.

"Stef…" Ana begins. "About Callie…"

**A/N I hope you guys like this chapter. I know it has taken a long time, but I hope it is long enough to make up for it. Please read and review.**

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